Stupid Idiot Jokes

Oh, how can some people be so stupid? Perhaps these idiot jokes will help you to keep the prats away.

Why is a stupid red-headed boy like a biscuit?
Because he's a ginger nut.

I don't know what it is that makes you stupid but whatever it is, it works.

An idiot was driving to London town. He saw the sign on the highway reading: "London Left".
So he turned around and went home...

Did you hear about the man who break his arm while raking leaves?
Yes, he fell out of the apple tree.

Why is the rapper Eminem so popular?
Because he is a cunning linguist.

What is red and hangs from a lemon tree?
A crazy raspberry.

Did you hear about the idiot who thought "Channel Number 5" was a new ferry route from Dover to Calais?

How do you know if a prat had been using the computer?
There is whiteout all over the monitor.

Why did the prat fall down?
Because he tripped over the mobile phone.

Did you see the idiot tap dancer?
Yes, he fell into the kitchen sink.

How can you tell if an idiot has sent you a fax?
You'll find a stamp attached to it.

What is the difference between Lilly Allen and a dried rollerball pen?
One is barking mad, the other is marking bad.

Once there was this prat. He wanted to cross the English channel on a plank but had to give up the idea because he couldn't find a plank long enough.

What is the Guinness book?
A beer catalogue.

You must think I am a perfect idiot.
No, you're not perfect.

Why did the idiot climb over the glass wall?
To see what's on the other side of it.

Why did the stupid sailor grab a bar of soap when his ship sank?
He thought he would wash himself ashore.

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